


Jolene

by Letsgetyourdeanon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-06-23 13:46:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19702588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Letsgetyourdeanon/pseuds/Letsgetyourdeanon
Summary: Jo Harvelle is back. And you're not sure what that means for your relationship with Dean.Based on the Dolly Parton song





	Jolene

Jo Harvelle was back.

None of you had quite believed it when it happened. You didn’t know where she had been or what had happened to her, but now she was back.

The second the bunker door opened and Sam found her standing outside, the boys had ran every single test they could think of. It was really her. Jo was human.

You hadn’t known Jo when she was alive, it had been years before you met the boys, but you knew that a friend was a rare creature in the world of the Winchesters. You were happy to see the joy in their eyes when she came back. There was nothing you wanted more than their happiness.

You and the eldest Winchester had been together for a number of years now. In the hunter life relationships hardly ever lasted, but yours had. That’s why you hardly took notice when Jo and Dean kept giving each other extra attention.

By now it had been a few months since Jo showed up at the bunker, and she had been living with you ever since.

It turned out that the Harvelles were well known in the old hunting circles, and some old friend hadn’t even questioned it when they helped Jo find her way back to the Winchesters. Apparently, her friendship with the boys had been common knowledge among the old-timers.

She spent a lot of time with all of you, and you got to know her fairly well. Jo was stubborn, and she knew how to get her way, but she was also kind, sweet, and the best girl friend you could ever remember having. She wasn’t afraid to stand up to the Winchesters, and had done so on your behalf on more than one occasion.

Having gotten to know her, you decided that you whatever the tension she and Dean had was, it didn’t matter. You trusted them both. Jo had been gone for years, of course he would be glad to have her back and want to spend time with her. It was only natural that they weren’t quite sure of how to act around each other after all this time.

Jo was your friend and you loved Dean, and you had never doubted your place in the bunker or with either of them.

The first time you ever questioned any of it, it was in the middle of the night.

Having had your fair share of bad hunts, you didn’t always sleep to well at night. Usually, a walk around the bunker and a glass of water would do the trick, that’s what you were hoping for this night as well.

Walking around the bunker in your sleep shorts and tank top had made you a little bit chilly, that’s how you liked it best. There was nothing better than crawling into bed with Dean when you were a little bit cold and feel his heat against you, lulling you to sleep.

Grabbing a glass of water, you made your way back to your bedroom. You took a couple of sips and placed the glass on the nightstand before you slid beneath the covers, snuggling into Dean. It was something you always did on nights like these. It always made you feel safe and loved. He put his arms around you and grabbed you tightly. Just as you let out a sigh of relief and was about to fall asleep, cuddled up to the man you loved, he said what made your entire body freeze in an instant.

“Jo.”

He sighed it out, making it sound like it was the most pleasant thing in the world to him.

Safe to say, you didn’t sleep a wink that night.

In the morning it soon became clear that Dean had no idea what he had said. You knew he would never do anything to hurt you while conscious, but it still stung to know that his subconscious would. And you couldn’t really help but wonder how much he really wanted to change his situation?

Since that night you had started noticing everything that went on between Dean and Jo. How her fingers would linger a bit too long whenever she touched him, or how his eyes would stay focused on her for a lot of the day.

Before, this would all have seemed like friendly gestures to you, they were friends who hadn’t seen each other in a really long time. But having heard Dean say her name like that, like it was complete bliss, it twisted something inside you and made you see what other meaning it all could have to them.

After a few weeks, you started to calm down. Maybe you had just been overreacting.

Dean had said another girls name in his sleep, so what? Said girl was stunning, sassy, flirty, kind, and everything else Dean could want, but she was also a friend of both of you. She would never do anything to risk your relationship, and neither would Dean. Right?

That was about as calm as you could get, at least until one night when you stayed up late to research with Sam.

Both Jo and Dean had gone to bed, having gotten enough lore for the day. You and Sam had decided that you were close to something, and you wanted to crack it before going to bed.

Jo may be your best girl friend, but Sam was your best friend. Nothing could change that. Knowing you were borderline driving yourself mad with every jealous thought running through your mind, you decided to ask Sam for some help. He had known them both in that earlier life, and you wanted to know more about it.

When you finally fessed up to him about how you felt, Sam just laughed at you, claiming Jo and her mother was a friend of both of the brothers and that there was nothing to worry about.

When he put it like that, you were almost ashamed of yourself, making him swear to secrecy. You didn’t want Dean to think you didn’t trust him, you did. You just didn’t trust that you were that desirable enough for him. Sam laughed once again, and agreed to your terms.

“All that was ever between those two was a silly school girl crush, and a kiss in a time of death.”

Sam said it as if it was nothing, as if all it did was point out that there was nothing to worry about. For you it meant the opposite. It must have shown on your face, because Sam was quick to add:

“They knew she was going to die. It was a desperate situation, nothing more.”

You knew you had gone pale when you nodded at Sam, but you tried to play it down. He said it meant nothing. Desperation leads to many weird actions.

The conversation had taken any energy you had left out of you, and you excused yourself.

It was a surprise to yourself that you made it back to your room with out breaking down. To Sam, kissing someone in a desperate situation might not mean something, but it did to you. In that kind of situation, you found out what was really important to you. To Dean and Jo, it had been each other.

That night you didn’t cuddle up to Dean. Instead you slept at the edge of your side of the bed, weeping as quietly as you could into the pillow.

Since then, you had done a lot of secret crying, and ignored a lot of signals, looks, and touches between Dean and Jo. However, there is a limit to everyone’s patience, and one day you finally reached yours.

Once again, you and Sam had been the ones doing the research. At the same time, Jo had decided to make a pie. It didn’t take long for Dean to join her, and it was just minutes later that you heard a lot of giggling coming from the kitchen. Sam just smirked, and shook his head at the two of them.

“Got’cha!”

Dean’s voice sounded throughout the bunker. That was the final straw for you.

Like any good hunter, you kept your emotions bottled up for as long as physically possible. When it no longer seemed do-able, you went and had a chat with your good, old, pal Jim Beam.

You drove some random old car from the bunker’s garage into town and your regular bar. It was rare that you went out somewhere so close to the bunker, and when you did it was usually to celebrate something. Today, it was to drink until you couldn’t feel anymore.

You had lost track of how long you’d been there when you felt a hand on your shoulder. Knowing you were in no shape to get rid of whoever it was, you just tried to shake it off, hoping they would go away and leave you alone.

“(Y/N)”

That really wasn’t a voice you had expected to hear. You thought Sam might figure it out and come get you, or maybe even Dean, but not for one second did you expect Jo. That’s why you ended up sitting there and just looking up at her, trying to figure out if she was real or if your mind was playing a cruel trick on you.

“(Y/N), why are you here drinking by yourself?”

Scoffing, you looked down at your drink, not wanting to see her.

“I’m a hunter, it’s what we do,” you replied as if it was completely obvious.

“Not when we have a home and people we care about waiting for us. Stop being coy and tell me what the hell is going on,” she actually sounded worried.

“It doesn’t matter. You should just go back. They’re probably missing you.”

If you had looked up, you would have seen the look of shock and disbelief on her face.

“Do you really think they would miss me and not you? (Y/N), Dean was so worried! No one had any idea where you had gone! And according to Sam, you didn’t seem to be in the best of moods when you did.”

You looked up at her then, and you knew she could see the hurt in your eyes, but you were too drunk to care. It didn’t matter anymore anyway. Soon, she would have everything you wanted, and you would be long gone.

“It’s okay, Jo. You don’t have to pretend for me. I know. I can’t really blame you, either of you.”

“What are you talking about?”

She seemed genuinely confused, and you somehow thought that was kind of funny. How blind did they really think you were?

“I see the way you look at each other, and the way you are together. I see you, and I know it’s not even a competition. There is nothing I have that you can’t offer. You are so beautiful… I can tell he really missed you. Did you know he says your name in his sleep? I don’t think he knows, but when he does, it sounds like he couldn’t imagine anything better.”

You stopped for a moment, and you felt a drop fall down on your hand on the bar. You hadn’t even realised that you had started crying. It didn’t matter anyway.

“It’s okay. I understand why he would want you. Just give me a few days, and I’ll be out of your way.”

Jo hadn’t said a word. This woman in front of her, this strong hunter seemed so broken, and she had no idea what to say in a moment like this.

“Can I just ask you a question?” You didn’t even wait for an answer. You just wanted to know.

“Why Dean? You could have anyone, why did it have to be Dean?”

It was clear to anyone but yourself at this point that the chances of you remembering any of this in the morning were slim to none. Jo pulled you gently of the bar stool, carrying most of your weight out to the parking lot. There stood the shining, black beauty that was the impala. Of course Dean had let her drive Baby. If you had the energy, you would have scoffed, instead you just groaned as Jo put you on the passenger side and drove you both back to the bunker.

Before helping you inside, Jo took the time to clean up your face. Things were bad enough as they were. There was no need for the guys to see how bad you really felt about yourself.

Dean chuckled when he saw Jo almost carrying you inside. He took over as soon as you reached the bottom of the stairs, and carried you back to your room. Somewhere in your sub-conscience you heard Jo say something about having to talk to him, but before you knew it, you were in your room.

You were laying on the bed as Dean stripped you of your boots and jeans. He was right there next to you, and even this flat out drunk version of you didn’t want to waste any of the precious minutes you had left with him.

He pulled the covers up over you and leaned down to kiss your cheek. Grabbing your opportunity, you wanted to make this right, so you took hold of his wrist to make sure you had his attention.

“I’m sorry, Dean…”

“What are you apologising for, Sweetheart? You’ve helped me to bed enough times when I was drunk,” he said softly as he caressed your cheek.

“I’m sorry I’m not Jo.”

As you said the words, his hand stopped moving.

You turned your back to him and fell into a restless sleep, filled with drunken thoughts and heartache.

Waking up the next morning, you had no recollection of what happened after your second drink at the bar, but you were still not surprised to wake up to an empty bed.

You could feel your head pounding, every inch of your body feeling like it had been to hell and back. And you knew, whatever you had done yesterday, it wasn’t good. It was better to just get up now and face the music. Maybe the fact that you were hung over would make whoever was upset with you have a little more compassion.

In a pair of sweats and the shirt you had slept in, you made your way towards the kitchen. The smell of bacon was like a spell, raising you from the dead, and you silently thanked whoever was making it, praying there was some for you.

Entering the kitchen, you found Dean with his back to you, whistling and frying some eggs and bacon.

“Dean, I love you, but my head is killing me, and that whistling isn’t helping.”

He turned around and smiled slightly at you, but it didn’t really reach his eyes. Quickly, he grabbed a plate and placed it in front of you, but not before filling it up with some of the deliciousness he’d made. Then he sat down on the chair next to you, carefully reaching for your hand, as if he was scared you wouldn’t let him touch you. When he finally got your hand in his, he grabbed hold of it tightly.

Feeling like something awkward was coming, most likely based on whatever you did last night, you wondered where Sam and Jo where. As soon as the thought entered your mind, you hoped they weren’t in the bunker. It was rare that you got to spend time alone with Dean, and you wanted to have him there with you for as long as possible.

“Where’s Sam and Jo?”

“They headed into town to make some errands, they won’t be back for a while,” he said in a soft voice.

Either, he knew how badly your head hurt, or he was worried he might scare you away.

“(Y/N), we need to talk.”

All signs of a hang over were suddenly forgotten.

Nothing good ever came after words like that, and considering the situation in the bunker lately, you weren’t really surprised. But that didn’t mean you were ready for it. It didn’t matter that Dean wanted someone else, you weren’t ready to let go of him just yet.

“Do… do we have to?” you asked in a shaky voice.

You couldn’t even remember the last time he called you by your name outside the bedroom. He always used nicknames, endearments. You felt a complete dread in the pit of your stomach, and tears started welling up in your eyes.

“Baby, no, it’s not like that,” he said desperately as the first tear rolled down your cheek, he brushed it away with the pad of his thumb.

“Last night, just before you went to sleep, you said something, and we need to talk about it.”

You didn’t know what you had said last night, but you knew it couldn’t be good.

“Do you remember?”

“No,” you whimpered.

“You told me you were sorry…” he took a deep breath before continuing.

“You told me you were sorry you’re not Jo.”

There was pain in his voice, and you wanted to do anything to take that pain away. Even if it meant leaving him and the bunker, and letting him be happy with Jo.

“(Y/N), what did you mean by that?”

Did you really have to spell it out for him? Was he going to make you do this?

“Dean, I see the way you look at her. How you act around her. I tried to write it up to you missing your old friend, but then…”

It was not a sentence you wanted to finish, but you knew you had no choice.

“But then, what?” he asked gently.

“Then I heard you say her name in your sleep. And Sammy told me about the kiss.”

You sobbed.

“I don’t want to be in the way of your happiness, Dean. I understand. Jo is amazing. You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll be out of here in a couple of days, and then you two can be together.”

This was it. This was you letting go of Dean, closing the door on your relationship. You slowly leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his cheek. It was the least you could do to say goodbye to the man you loved.

Just as you stood up to go back to your room to pack your bags, you felt him grab a hold of your arm. He turned you around to face him, making sure you had to look at him.

“Baby, what the hell are you talking about? There is no way I’m letting you walk out that door. Jo is a friend, and I missed her. She was dead, and I thought it was all my fault!”

“It’s not your fault every time someone dies, Dean,” you answered dryly.

“That’s not what matters right now!” He said exasperated.

“What matters is that you thought I wanted someone else more than you? That I had stopped loving you? Believe me when I say, that is never going to happen! And I’m gonna kick Sam’s ass for telling you about that kiss, because it didn’t mean half as much as it does every time I get to kiss you. I care about Jo, and there might have been something there years ago, but none of that matters now. I don’t want anyone else, I want you. And I’m really sorry that I, even for a second, let you doubt that.”

Dean had never even told you that he loved you, but now he was standing in front of you, saying not only that, but also that he wanted only you. Even before someone as perfect for him as Jo.

You couldn’t have said no to him even if you wanted to.

Dean Winchester was the love of your life. You were so glad you didn’t lose him, because you knew you could never love anyone like that again.

In that moment it didn’t matter that Jo Harvelle was back, all that mattered was that you and Dean were going to be okay.


End file.
